Friday, January 11, 2008
:) twisted tale.
current mood: dreadful
I was feeling fine hours ago. I smiled, laughed, had a good book, had a good company, had good blasting musics and had a good time. Although I was down with sinus, my day went on fine until a couple of minutes ago. I am sleepy, but I have to get this off my chest first. Here, tonight, my rants. Again. :)
There never existed between us, an agreement that I will be with him. I informed him rather at the initial, to always take it slow. He pesters and never understood the meaning of a respite. My mistake was to mislead a broken soul, and I tried to make it better, knowing that he will hate me for it. I do not need him to be strong for me nor do I need any other helping souls. I am not shutting the world out, you are free to be my friend, BUT that is where i draw the line. I need me now. I need to feel this pain alone and be strong. I need to be independent. I do not reckon he understand. And this is where I am selfish. It's also my happiness we are talking about. He never understood. And I can never love any other. For now, at least. I am sorry. But I did say, it will hurt, waiting for me. And it did.
He blamed it all on me, of course. Tonight, his words cut like piercings from a dagger, it hits right on target, the heart. Good bye you.
There exist in me this hope that the return of the long awaited prince would come sooner. It has been 3 months. Good night beautiful world.
'fimaaa
❤ imperfectly written at 1:21 AM
