:) world.
current mood: pissed&drunk

Funny how life works. The way you have to pull many different strings to get things your way. Or the way you have to cheat and lie, just to ease the pain of others. Funny how you will never get what you really wanted, no matter how hard you tried. There is always that one thing you can never get. Ever thought about it? And how many of us actually live life wearing a smile everyday, and actually meaning that smile? Funny how we hide behind our layers of façade, just to cover our vulnerable side. Why? Maybe we want to show the world that we are strong. Or maybe we made a mistake, just obeying the ultimate sin, a human's ego.

This entry will be long. Spare me a few moments in your life, not that I actually have readers here. But I need to get this off my chest. And after reading this, I want you to know that I am fine. It's just another rant. So don't bother asking me how I am coping.

& the story goes. A stranger, who became a friend, then a lover, a friend again and back to becoming a stranger. It was a love story that ended just like many others. (And I have heard that life is about stories of loosing someone) And hers was similar to all. After loosing what she believed to be her soul mate, she loss every happiness in her. Every night she prays for his heart to accept her again. She held on to the slightest sign of hope for them to reconcile. Every prayer, every dream and every hope breathe his name. Her "world", she calls him. Finally, when too many obstacles blocked their path, the world to her seems much more deserted than before. So she sat off, finding comfort in another. She too needed rest.

It was not that she did not love him enough. Nor was it that she could not wait any longer. She believes in faith. In the truth that God has made plans for all of us. She believes in following her heart, because that’s the only thing she can trust. Its not that she wanted it to end this way, but it was just clear that this was the only path for her to take. Not that she had a choice, but at least she was keen to have moved on.

Now she sleeps in the arms of another. Yet her heart seems far away. She learns to love another but the past remains unchanged. It’s not as though she did not love him, but she just had to move away. She found comfort somewhere new. And she smiles again. So world, give her a chance to live again. Let that smile be real. Let that smile last for her. She deserves to be happy too. Dear world, please stop your games. She is tried. Really.
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I know the pain of loosing because I loose alot. Her story is one I am best at understanding. She's a good friend. And she says, "deep down inside, reveals a truth that no one will know or understand. I do love him but it just was not meant to be. The sadest part is, he won't listen."
Maybe I do understand. Just maybe, I was where she is now.

However, I want to say that I love where I am now. I do.
I have learnt about things beyond what I imagined I could.
&I do love you, dearest mister clown. You have become a part of my life. :)

Good night you.

'fimaaa